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The editorial staff at Universe has today called a press conference to explain their manifesto that the best way to deliver quality journalism is to act as an uncritical mouthpiece for the Guild.

“We completely reject the recent claims from our competitors that you can improve a publication by not stacking it with stupol hacks,” the editors said in a joint statement.

“While we admit that students do their utmost to avoid student politics in all its forms, we feel that the best way to respond to that issue is to constantly, and enthusiastically remind them that not only does Epic exist, but its dictatorship is a benevolent one,” they said.

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